The hardest part is forgetting
And every time a year goes by
It feels like another part of you is melting
And it's slowly erasing from my mind

And I feel the pain that lets me know I'm alive
And I feel the loss that lets me know that you're not
But mostly I feel nothing
Like a vain body with a loaded heart
I'm numb

I stopped crying long ago
About how everything's so messed up
And how I ruin everything I touch
And how I hurt the ones I love
So they could leave with out regrets
About why the fuck they couldn't help
Damn, I have to help myself get through this

But I'm a lot like you, you know
I give my all to everyone
And I deal with everything alone
I think its better then to trust someone
And I have this perfect mask  
Just like the one you used to wear
So that no one would have to ask
"what's wrong?" - there's no answer to that.

Sometimes it hits me - you're not coming back
And it's been five years already
You'd think I'd be past that
But I guess it's a relief
To know I hadn't completely forgotten
And you know, I hadn't completely forgiven
But either way, I'll always love you - mother.