When I'm looking around with no remorse,
everything just withers and falls,
the tan on my body disappears,
white shadow takes its place.
I become a ghost on the trail of the living things.
I feel that feelings are just words and sins,
and love is extinct, with no residues or signs.
All that left is saying to others that optimistic - life
sadistic, comforting words which I don't even believe and
just desert.

I have no words to say,
I have none to feel,
I am standing on the street waiting for the rain.
Desiring to be picked up by the slight wind to a better
place, be re-forged with harder metal,
be rebuilt with better parts.

Loneliness will self destruct,
will never be again a part of my heart.
I'll see future at everyday,
and will never seek the dawn and night to feel home and
safe.
I'll be walking with a different look on my face,
A strange smile controlling my face,
But not from blindness to the present and to its daily
poison dripping to my veins,
But from the true happenings which occur in my way.
My wanting in life will rebirth, as a tree in the spring
after the dark winter cold.

But it's all just a desiring need, a hope, a dream,
something too surrealistic to be real.