Leslie Says

On that first day
When I walked out the front door
onto the porch I saw a double line
of people facing each other
holding big boards

Later when I was nine years old
Leslie says, "I think you've made it Stanley,
you're going to be a man soon,
What are you going to do?"

"Well I'm sick of dinosaurs
and I'm sick of the stars but
this sandwich is good!" I says

"And the lettuce is so green!"
Leslie says

When we were nine years old
and I was talking to Richard
and their mother, Leslie came
downstairs in her underwear
to answer the phone and her mother says,
"She must really like you, I"ve
never seen her come down in her underwear
before."  I knew she liked me, Leslie liked
everyone.  I still wonder about that.

When she went back upstairs I watched that
wonderful butt and those funny splayed feet
and I saw her as she would be at twenty
so I was twenty too for those few seconds
until she disappeared.

When I was twenty and married
Leslie came to visit us and
my wife wouldn't leave her alone
she was so freaked out
but I saw that Leslie was troubled and needed
to talk and when we said good-bye
Leslie says, "You seem so mature!"
"I could really give a shit!" I says
and we both felt good again

When I was nine years old
I had to take the dog out in the morning
and tie him up to a rope in the back yard.
He would pull me down the street thru
the ice and snow and sometimes
as we passed Leslie's house she
would come running out and help me
take him back and I remember how my
skin would sting as we thawed
in the hallway.

"I always see this ideal woman hovering
around you!" Ellen says.
I didn't want to say she was real
and I didn't want to lie,
I was stupid so I says,
"Yes, but it doesn't matter"
And I saw the shock of hurt
and the sadness in her eyes
like she was going to cry.

I know you say that you
don't have a King or a Queen
but that's just your ventriloquist
talking.  I saw them the other day
and they were holding big boards
facing each other,

"We're carpenters because we work
in wood!" Says your Queen

"And the lettuce is so green!"
Says your King

When I asked John about it
he says, "You should let it go
for someone real"
"she is real" I says
"I mean alive" he says

On the way to the airport
Leslie says,
"Does Stanley do drugs
and hang out with low-lifes
because he enjoys it
or because it's part of the job?
You'll never know and it doesn"t
matter!"

It was nice of her to say
that, to look at it that way
"Dare to be wrong!"  I says,
and we laughed all the way
to the boarding gate.

I saw your God the other day
and boy, was that bush burning!
"Do you have anything to say
to those people down there?" I asked
"Just a second," he says,
"I've got to find a match"

I think you should have replaced
those filaments yourself instead of
asking that God of yours for a match

"Dare to be wrong!" Leslie says