this series of poems is presented as one unit, but i feel
that each poem stands on its own

hey, killer (the killer series: no.1)

    hey, killer
    ready to go?
    what did you dream about tonight?
    were you able to sleep?
    or were you so anxious to see blood?
    did you dream about the knife?
    did you dream about the gun?
    did you create some new exciting ways to kill?
    do you realize today's the day?
    are you able to think of anything else but your first
killing?
    will you feel ashamed?
    will you want more?
    do you want to find out?
    I do.
    lets go.

first (the killer series: no.2)

    first
    you must choose the person
    who will be your first.
    most people like you prefer to choose
    someone special.
    a special first time.

    look around you.
    do you see anything you like?
    her?
    go ahead. don't be shy.
    nervous, huh?
    don't be.

    while you ask
    her
    up to your apartment,
    she smiles.
    you're shaking.
    stop shaking or she'll flee.

    you climb up the stairs behind
    her.
    you size
    her
    up. the door opens like magic
    so you can both get inside.

    you lock the door behind you, trying not to tremble.
    you show
    her
    to the kitchen
    she's got a questioning look in
    her
    eyes, but she doesn't say a word.

    your mind is empty now
    blank, as it should be.
    no shaking.
    no trembling.
    you know exactly what to do.
    after you sit
    her
    down, you turn around to the knife stand.
    she watches you.
    you pull one knife and turn around,
    back to
    her.
    she's silent.

    slowly you cut across one cheek.
    she's silent.
    slowly you cut across the other.
    she's silent.
    you're excited. you're aroused.
    she's bleeding.

    as you take
    her
    to the bed
    you start shaking again.

    STOP IT!
    she shout's when you are both on the bed.
    but you can't stop.
    the next slice shuts
    her
    up.

    for the first time you smell
    the smell of blood that isn't yours.
    for the first time
    the cut flesh isn't yours.
    for the first time
    your every desire is fulfilled.

    this is your talent.
    this is your destiny.
    murder is a harsh but true word.
    there's no room for shame.

    go on.
    you deserve another body.
    soon you will have many more on your list.

her (the killer series: no.3)

    her,
    she is far away now.
    she is no longer.
    deceased.
    buried in the past.
    time to recover, time to heal.
    time to move on to the next.

    for you these moments of weakness are danger.
    each time another is gone you go through this mourning
stage.

    SHE'S DEAD, for christ sake!
    MOVE ON!
    move on to the next or you'll get caught.
    they know you've killed
    her
    and others before
    her.
    if you don't get a move on
    they'll catch you.

stained with blood (the killer series: no.4)

    stained with blood
    the blood of others runs in your veins.
    you're running away from yourself.
    you'll come back. oh, yes, you will.
    you can forget your killings
    but they will always be there
    behind you.
    inside you.
    you think pretending will help?
    you put on the face of a child.
    just a little kid, careless and spineless.
    just a little kid with a sick mind
    and terrible nightmares of the past.
    the past is you, can't you see?
    you were born to kill.
    when birth was given to you, death was recreated.

    you'll come back. oh, yes, you will.