So there was this guy, who was straight, but tone-deaf.
Whenever he was married (which was often) he would get into
these arguments with the missus about shower singing. The
problem with women, he would say, is that they don't
appreciate a good, wholesome hobby. So, he switched wives.

Now he is a policeman, and practices Zen on weekends. He is
unmarried, and owns a purebred German Shepard. The dog acts
as a "tone dog" in the same way that a "seeing dog" aids the
blind. They may just as well be married, except for the sex
part. I know it's impolite to ask about these things, but I
just blurted out to him (as he was writing me a speeding
ticket): "So, do you do the dog?" He said no, and I believe
him. After all, I meet him at Zen meditation every other
weekend. I miss wife #43. I think she was a lesbian.