Hey you, it's your old friend bad memory taking over to
write you down some times you are not to forget:
Late December 2002:
I feel like the last couple of months have been really good
to us, we've become closer and closer, and I can truly call
you my best friend as well as your best friend. And I LOVE
you; and you know it.
It saddens me that you don't know how and how much.
You make me happy; when you're not here, I miss you; there
is no together, unless it's you and me.
If I go on a desert island and I'll need to take 3 things
they will be:
1. You.
2. A copy of "Lord of the rings"
3.a loaded gun
You were never second, and I doubt you will be.
You got so close to me, you even wanted to sleep at my
place, and we did for a few times, but it made me feel like
we're together and it didn't feel well in the morning, cause
I felt alone.
For this past year we were friends and even close friends
towards the end, and when I felt like finally I was able to
bend you a little, get closer, maybe to finally make you
understand my feelings...at that moment, he sent you an
SMS.
It made you smile, so I was happy.
Some more positive SMS from him, and I'm becoming a little
nervous.
You hide it from me - you met him behind my knowledge, a
little scratch is on my heart now.
You continue to see him the following day, and I know you
spent the night at his place.
Same story the day after only I see your car at his place, a
stab is in my chest...
I'm all alone, just the way I was born, and I need some
help, some compassion. I see you but it barely helps.
You're SO beautiful!
I'm alone in this town, trying to find an ear that will
listen, that can give a direction to a nice free heart.
All I see is rain and tears.
I'm driving, curiosity attacks me, I wanna see if old
habits are re-lived.
It seems they aren't...oh, wait, it turns out I was wrong.
He has pretty eyes, but I saw them for less than a second as
I pushed hard on the gas pedal.
I called a wise woman, asked her to help me disconnect.
I went to a fountain, felt like hanging on a rail, and here
comes the train. A small chance saves your sea.
Day after: I want a hug, so I ask you to stand, I'm noticing
your tears, and it pinches my heart. Talking to you,
realizing what is happening, and suddenly, my eyes are
useless, my ears are echoing with what you said and my small
heart is red and mad. I wanna punch him out.
I realize it's you, you be careful for what you wish for.
I hate you.
I hate you for what you've done.
And it deserves the destruction of your sea.
Lucky for you, now I have patience.
At least until tomorrow,
we will see.
Epilogue
Time...
I forgot it is not a factor.
I gave you one day till I believed I would have destroyed
your sea.
As you see, it took me more than one or two days, but the
important thing is that it came finally.
You disappointed me again, you made yourself get hurt again,
and I felt it as well, dear.
Time doesn't matter. What's important is that I knew this
day was upon us when you'd make me pain one more time. One
time too much.
Your sea is destroyed, and I'm crying a new one in my bed.
The trial has ended, and I find you guilty. This is why you
cry about the destruction of your sea. |