Rami was excited for his new job. "Working at a research lab
again" he thought
"Ha the smell of sulfuric acid, the weird dangerous genetic
monsters, creating new ways to cause havoc and mass
destruction, the screams of human test subjects... HA the
screams, sure is science at his best." Rami reminisced.
The green goo compound is your every day research lab with
the cutting edge technology at pastry space technology,
digitizing the lollypop industry and other vegetable
organizing methods.
Rami got to the receptionist who was like all other
receptionist, she had blond curly hair and big black glasses
very ordinary except the fact that she was half dog but Rami
couldn't know about it because she was standing behind a big
mahogany desk who could, apparently, survive a nuclear blast
and probably that was his job.
"Hello, how can I help you?" asked the receptionist
"Hello I'm doctor blang brang - a large train passed and
made a loud noise as she passed the tracks - I'm beginning
to work today here"
"Oh so you are doctor blang brang - another train passed -
alright doctor doom will take you to your lab"
"Come with me please" he said while climbing aboard a train
which led to depth of the world.
"So doctor blang you are doctor of what exactly?"
"You can call me Rami and I've a PH.D in brang blang
because blang blang voosh and it was really blang blrng
and I found out blang blang bling that is why I'm always
all so blang brnag.
The train came to a halt and both of the scientists got off
the train and moved to the next room which was the only room
with a doorknob that wasn't just painted on the doors.
"Lets suit you up" Dr. Doom said.
"No, its ok I have my own lab coat."
"No I was talking about your environmental l suit"
"My what?"
"Here put this on" Rami felt like putting this suit
resembles a lot like wearing a battle-suit
After he finished Rami walked into the next room which was
white and had a big window on one of his walls there he
could see Dr. Doom approaching the microphone.
"This is the standard C-138 environmental suit"
"Standard I didn't see anyone else wearing it"
"It is designed to withhold extreme heat." A cone of flames
surrounded Rami
"Ick" was the most suitable answer he could think about
"Suit temperature reaching critical levels activating inner
cooling system" a sexy female voice reached from deep inside
Rami's suit. Rami's body began to chill and he didn't even
feel the heat engulfing him
"Cool"
"It is designed to sustain radiation and acid" said Dr. Doom
to through the microphone
The room turned green which is the only way to visually
describe a radiated room since radiation has no physical
form, and a strange fluid covered the floor, strange sparks
came out of the fluid. It is common knowledge that acids are
brownish fluids who has sparks jumping out of them this
analogy is generally used by poor animists and lousy
writers.
"Life environment stabilized" the suit said
"Very cool"
"It is designed to sustain a 12 gauge shot"
"A what?" Rami screamed and looked for a way out
A shot was fired towards Rami and didn't even nudged him
"I...  AM...  INVINCIBLE!" he said while laughing a maniacal
laugh
"It was designed to sustain high voltage
"Bring it on" he yelled
12,000 volts traveled through Rami's body
BZT would describe the situation best... light flickered
and smoke came out of Rami as he stopped his death
twitches.
"Guess we need to work on that one" said Dr. Doom to the
intern standing next to him while he put a hand covering the
microphone
"Mommy, are we having roast chicken for dinner" he mumbled
while his entire body was fried  
Rami stood up and tried to take control again over his body
again.
"Good I see you are conscious again"
"Got any questions?"
"Hmmm.... Oh i've got one" Rami raised his hand and jumped
up and down like school student
"Yes Rami"
"Hmmm... why did you have to fry me?"
"It was imperative that you'll learn the capability of you
armor... I mean environmental suit"
"Why do I even need an environmental suit anyway?"
"Hmm... because of the blang blang"
"What? I didn't hear u because of that damn train."
"Never mind the experiment is about to begin."
Dr. doom grabed rami by the hand and dragged him to the
nearest room. The room was filled wall to wall with all
sorts of monitors and computers beeping creating a perfect
harmonics. Couple of doctors was standing next to a big
terminal which featured couple of T.V screens. One of the
doctors turned around, not like normal people do. It looked
like he had a predetermined pivot axis.
"Oh, you've got here just in time we goona begin the
experiment"
"What experiment ex..." Rami began to ask but the loud
noise, which Rami could describe as something big charging,
interrupted him.
Once Rami claimed that the gods of fate didn't like him. He
was totally wrong. The gods of fate did like him; in fact he
was their favorite toy.
By instinct Rami knew every time that he and electrical
experimental appliances came in contact something bad could
happen.
This time was no different. Rami used his highly developed
disaster senses and took cover under the first heavy,
unstable terminal he could find. His senses were developed
enough to spot an approaching danger, learned from past
experience. They weren't however capable of choosing the
best course of action, not learned from past experience.

Rami woke up after some time he was unconscious when one
doctor pulled him out of the wreckages.
"Are you ok?" the man asked
"God, I think I have a concussion!" Rami grabbed his hand
trying to prevent it from falling
"The experiment went bad."
"You're all blurry to me. I need a medical attention ASAP"
"You need to help the others" the man said as if he read it
from a script ignoring Rami pleading for mercy
"Man, there's yellow stuff coming out of my nose and ears."
Rami looked at his sleeve dripping yellow goo.
"And I think I punctured a lung" continued Rami as he tried
to breath. All he got was the graceful sound of someone
blowing air through a straw in a water filled glass,    
"I just might die if I don't get to a hospital"
"They might be in danger" the man insisted
"Who might be? Why?" Rami spat some more blood.
"The experiment went wrong."
"What was the experiment? I don't even know." Rami snapped
at him
"We tried to create a happier vegetables but something went
wrong. We have created a homicidal, mildly irritated race of
vegetables that have over run us.
"That's all nice but why me?" Rami asked knowing he would
not like the answer.
"You have the environmental suit and with your training it
should be piece of cake."
"What training? I'm just a scientist, a doctor of..." Rami
paused.
"Of what..." puzzlement struck the strange man.
"What no train... I'm a doctor of blang blang" Rami
expression changed from shocked to frustration
"Doesn't matter you still got to help them."  
"Look, I'm frickin spitting blood here" Rami spat some blood
theatrically to prove his point.
"Don't worry about it." The strange doctor grabbed a first
aid box and banged it on Rami's head reputedly
"Och Ow. Ok stop it I'm better, Geez."
As Rami stood up he heard the sound of many, tiny little
feet step, much like a caterpillar wearing steps shoes
walking on a tin roof. A bunch of tiny, mildly irritated
looking carrots appeared and stormed Rami. The carrots
entered the room through a hole in the wall which,
apparently, was created by some sort of a blast.
As they were about to nibble what was left of Rami couple of
heavily armed guards appeared in the balcony above. "Here
Dr! use this." They tossed Rami a potato masher.
"what the..." Rami examined the tool "what would I do with
that? Can't you give me one of those things with the high
voltage plasma warning" he asked
"Damn" he thought as the carrots swarmed him.
Rami frantically swung the masher in front of the carrots,
like people swinging fiery branch in front of a pack of
hungry wolves. That action like most times had no apparent
results. One of the carrots leaped and bit his arms. You
would think a mildly irritated, homicidal, genetic
engineered monster could cause some serious damage. But to
remind you we were talking about vegetables
When that, realization of the truth, dawned on Rami he
started laughing maniacally and stomping them to their
mildly irritated death.
The man who dug up Rami ran through the hole which the
vegetables came from. "Quick we've got to save the others"
he said and waved his hand signaling Rami to come.
"From what? Those are frickin tiny carrots."
"Quick come" said the man again
"Ok" Rami came after him reluctantly
They went through a dark passage way light flickered from
time to time temporarily lighting the tunnel. The tunnel
became smaller and smaller until Rami had reduced to a crawl
in order to carry on. At one point, a lettuce leaf fell on
Rami's head. He turned around to the man behind him and
showed him the petal.
"Is this a lettuce?" Rami asked cautiously.
"..." the man looked horrified "there something behind you"
he said quietly.
Rami turned around as quickly as he can but it was too late.
And the lettuce jumped on his head and surrounded him with a
leafy death.
"Umm... excuse me" said Rami from behind the leaves.
"Fies faithful fiervant" said lettuce with a leafy tone a
voice
"What exactly are you doing?" Asked Rami trying to control
his temper
"Fi'm fiaking fontrol fover your mind fihus fiurning you
finto a fiindless fiombie to fio my fiidings." Rami could
have sworn he saw the lettuce raising her leaf in a way a
dictator raises his fist in a rhetorical way.
"My brain has decomposed for years infront of the T.V I
don't think a lettuce could harm me" explained Rami the
situation, too his much amazement, to the lettuce.
He removed the bewildered lettuce from his head and carried
on. "Stupid vegetables" he thought out loud.
Finaly the tunnel came to an end with a ventilation vent
which was looking to a long corridor filled with creates.
Rami was glad for the opportunity to stand upright. A
Thought process commenced in Rami's brain which went like
this: long corridor-crates-taking cover-gun fire-sure
death-vanilla ice cream-yammy.
Once again his highly developed senses didn't fail him and
he jumped for cover before the first shot, he jumped face
first in to a metal pole.
A barrage of fire hit the creates which Rami was hiding
behind. Couple of shots missed Rami's head by a few inches.
"Blon't poot I'f ne" he mumbled trying to organize his jaw
back to her place.
The marines stopped the shooting "What did you say?" one of
the marines shouted firing another burst to make sure Rami
understand their intensions.
tfue Rami spat some teeth out. "I said don't shoot I'm Dr.
blang blang"
"What?" the marine shouted letting a single bullet out
"It's Dr blang blang" "damn that train" he hissed.
"Can't hear you"
"Don't shoot it Dr. blang blang Dr. blang blang Dr.
blang blang" he tried "how many trains are there in here,
damn that anti-character development system" he thought to
himself.
"What? Come again"
"Ahhh... never mind I'm coming out" Rami came out from
behind his cover with hands raised.
"oh my god is wearing the environmental suit flee for you
life" one of the marines pointed out and started running a
way
all the marines dropped their weapons and fled the area
screaming "leave every thing behind... every man to
himself...please don't hurt us... I don't want to die...
mommy... I'm a fluffy little puppy..."
Rami stood still astounded by the recent events and confused
by the multi-head trauma he was suffering from.
A watery thud and a smell of tomatoes came from behind Rami.
"What now?" he thought. "Oh no" he said as he turned around.
A giant tomato was standing, before him.
"How these things keep happing to me" he said to himself. A
distant godly laugh rolled across the sky. The giant tomato
began to laugh evilly and an invisible cape flapped with an
invisible wind. Rami started to run down the corridor. The
tomato rolled behind him.
The corridor led to a bigger tunnel and Rami run until he
reached a dead end, more like he couldn't breathe any more,
still had the same effect.
While he bended trying to catch his breath, which is hard to
do after u ran so much and don't have the power to run catch
something else now, he realized he was standing on train
tracks. Rami grinned.
"My name is..." He began clung voom two figures engaged is
a sword fight appeared from a strange portal. One was
wearing a big black helmet and a big black armor the other
was wearing long robes.
kuff kaff the black figure panted while he struck the
robed one. The two laser swords making a silly noise and
clashed.
"Join me kuff Kaff Rami..." the black figure said
"Rami?!" Rami said.
The figures stopped. The robed figure looked at Rami and
pointed. "you" they both said. The black figure took
advantage and tried to sneak an attack. The robed figure
blocked it with the elegance of an African elephant. The
figures disappeared as they came.
"That was weird" the tomato said
"Damn I've got a star-wars episode soon" Rami said then he
remembered his plan
"My name is Dr. blang blang a train came down the tracks.
Rami could feel a godly finger was pointed at him and how
the owner of the finger laughed.
He turned around.
"Oh shit" said Rami right before the train hit him.