Somewhere in this world exist a small town which houses many
villains and heroes
that small town must be located on a hell hole so those
heroes visting will have something to battle.

Most heroes would want to destroy evil. This time it was
different. This time traveling through harsh swampy land and
cold mountain peaks was a different kind of... well a hero.
The hellish canine known has Dortmund. Being a possessed dog
has sent Dortmund on a new quest to discover the whereabouts
of Diablo's prison also known as the "soul-stone". He did
not, however, go to rid the world of this monstrosity but to
enlist him to his aid to destroy the world. Sound weird well
it is but makes a good writing topic.

At the city gates, at lest at the place where, if the city
had walls or if it was a real city, not a couple of thatched
huts, an engineer would have placed the gates. At any rate
at that place stood tally, for a dog of course, Dortmund
ready to embark, which is fairly easy to him because of his
canine persuasion (I thought It was funny as HELL ahh ahh
another pun), on his new quest.
"Damn I'm frickin freezing and starving" Dortmund thought to
himself. I should find something in this out of place town.
Dortmund had no problem finding the local tavern since all
the population of that town, several by number, were waiting
out of their homes and if u stared at them for a couple of
seconds a flashing sigh would appear above them describing
their name and occupation. Dortmund galloped to the local
barkeep.
"Hello..." Dortmund looked above the barkeep head for a few
seconds "Khalenk" finished Dortmund "isn't it a little odd
name in today's world don't you think?"
"Hello there welcome to brimstone, a lot of time has passed
since you last visited us..." said the barkeep in a
monotonous voice and just kept staring at point in space
where, if Dortmund was a man, would be his face.
"What are you talking about I've never been here, I wonder
anyone has ever been here do you know what have I been
through to get here, god man build a frickin bus stop these
is the 21st century"
"Lots of fiends have terrorized this town since the last
couple of months"
"What the hell, which is apparently close by, are you
talking about?"
"Many atrocities come here and..."
"Atrocities... didn't heard that word in eons since the dark
invasion... look all I want is food, some sort of
nutrition"
"They have taken my favorite lamb and dragged her..."
"Are you even listening to me?!"
"Strange noises can be heard at night"
"Ahh... never mind ill try someone else"
Dortmund went to the next guy who was standing still and
occasionally doing a small pivot. Dortmund fashioned it to
some sort of method to prevent his neck from degenerating.
"Ahh... hello" ventured Dortmund
"Greeting n' salutations"
"You know I should smite u for just using those words...can
I get some food I'll pay"
"What is that list? What would I do with a full plate
mail... ahh +5 strength? And how come I can measure its
volume in squares? I just want to eat I'm hungry"
"If you can bring back my hammer that those demons stole:
"Now why would I do that I see no reason"
: If you can bring back my hammer that those demons stole
"Ahh what is wrong with you people must be something in the
water. I'm going to try and get some food the dog way"
"Cant believe a demon of my stature has to walk and find
food, I used to have such glorious wings not that I could
used them, DAMN that concept, being a demon isn't what it
set out to be" muttered Dortmund while he walked to the
outskirts of town and fell to the open hell hole. Some would
say he fell because he didn't see it. Some might say it had
no warning, some would say it was just a way to advance the
plot; I wouldn't if I were them because accidents could
happen to people who are not careful enough.

No matter the reason he still fell down the hell hole and
found himself in a gothic and creepy crypt, which made him
feel at home. The sound of rattling bones, dragging feet and
the smell of rotting meat concerned him and remind him of
his hunger.
A horde of skeletons charged Dortmund the horde was lead by
a colorful skeleton.
Dortmund didn't even flinch just shrugged as much as a dog
can. The horde closed in on Dortmund and as the smell of
bones increased an older instinct took control over Dortmund
body an older and more primal instinct.
When the smell strengthens and overtook his senses Dortmund
lipped into the fray and started ripping bones. One can only
describe it as inhuman and since it was involving dogs,
skeletons and demons- one would be correct.
Bones were flying every where and although they were
mindless undead every bone in the world knew to identify a
hungry dog, not to mention a demon possessed dog like
Dortmund, and fear it. If one would look closely he could
actually see their expression change.
After the battle was over Dortmund felt a power rage flowing
in his body which he could describe only as "level up" and
he instantaneously grew stronger. With some strange reason
he could have known how strong he was with numerical
precision.
"A strange place it is" thought Dortmund out loud a man with
a battle weary armor and big bloody sword emerged from a
dark corridor
"Hello there" yelled Dortmund. There was no replay. "I said
hello" tried Dortmund again
The character moved into the light and weird bubble appeared
above his head when he entered the light.
"Hello to you too" he said or at least wrote.
"Do you know where we are?"
"Of course" the weird character produced a map and showed
Dortmund. A blinking red and blue light marked their
location as, head hunter178, Dortmund have learned,
explained.
"So you are saying I've got this map thingy too installed
with gps and everything?"
"Yes" a strange mechanical voice said
"Can you take me to Diablo?"
With out much saying head hunter made a silly gesture which
looked like he was trying to sniff his armpits or something
and a blue portal appeared.
Dortmund had already learned the trick and stared at the
portal and somehow knew it was leading to Diablo's chamber
"so tell me ..." asked Dortmund when they went through the
portal.

"If you get this cool teleportation device and a GPS why are
you using swords?"
"You know it's been a while since I've been to hell I didn't
know they had remodeled"
The place was very geometrical designed it was fashioned as
a lot of rooms connected with doors and long passageways
clearly it was designed by a madman or at least someone who
didn't have a 3D engine.
A couple of weird looking doom knights charged Dortmund and
his companion while they were about to attack Dortmund
surprised them with a question: "so you're like, just
waiting for a hero to come and slay you?"
The attack stopped all of sudden and the doom knights look
puzzled until one of them said: "come to think of it... Yes"
said in a metallic voice
"And the pay isn't much either"
"Yeah" they all screamed in unity which sounded like some
one hitting an anvil in a long metallic tube
"And they make us wear that ridiculous horned armor. It
weighs a ton" added one from the back
"Yeah"
"And we don't get enough breaks" added another one
"Yeah"
"Vote me for president" one screamed with an odd voice
"Yea... what?" they all silenced
"It was worth a shot" said Dortmund.
"I say we strike" suggested one of them
"Strike, strike, strike" they all yelled.
Head hunter 178 was a bit confused but took advantage of the
rumble and robed one of the graves. Dortmund went right
passed the striking demons who begun working on their
demands and producing picked signs out of some bones found
on the floor.
"How did you know you'll find gold there?"
"The sun comes out every dawn you find gold in graves common
sense" said... wrote Head Hunter 178
"This sound kinda of a rip-off from Terry Pratchett isn't
it"
The cloud went dark although they were a couple of hundred
meters underground the heroes could sense the meaning. They
better have if they know what's good for them.
The ground trembled and a huge horned beast approached the
scene.
"What's going on here?" said the beast in a voice that could
only be described as weird
"Were on strike until you meet our demands" said one of the
doom knights.
"Are you Diablo?" asked Dortmund
"Yes, you are probably the negotiator on behalf of my
minions"
"Sure why not" tried Dortmund.
"What are your demands?"
"They want better salary, bigger breaks and some more
recreational activity or else"
"Or else what?"
"We will move to the world of warcraft!" said one of the
knights
"Yeah" they screamed
"IT IS IN FULL 3D" said one
"AND BETTER BALANCED" he add later
"Look" said Diablo "you know money is a bit stressing since
it takes Blizzard two years to put something new on the
market I can't afford raising your salary"
A huge argument broke out between... well... everybody.
"Hmm" Dortmund coughed politely the whole crowd went silent
"Sorry to disturb but..." Dortmund felt the pressure of a
hundred eyes staring at him.
"But I was wandering would you like to join me in my quest
to destroy the earth?"
"How much are you paying?" asked one of the death knights
"I'm kinda broke but you can enjoy the suffering of humans"
"Oh no were not falling for this one again"
"Yeah" they screamed again
"Strike, strike, strike..." they carried on
"Look I" Diablo tried but nobody listened
"This is pointless" said Dortmund
"Well mate I'm off trying to sell my uniques on e-bay" said
Head Hunter 178 and disappeared
"Guess it was a stupid idea" said, Dortmund to himself and
went back home.