"Now you have to remember all of these instructions" said
the clerk, "we don't want another 'Charles Billbrook' on our
hands"
   "Don't worry" said Mike, "this isn't the first time me
and God had a business lunch"
   "Well I am informed as you know of everything that
happens here" said the old clerk in an annoying voice, "so
don't even think of taking another pen from his desk!"
   "Hey you know how much that baby got me on the lower
level market?"
   "I don't want to know!!" the clerk took out a golden key
and opened the gigantic marble door.
    What ever happened to 'lawyer-client confidentiality'?!
Mike didn't know. As he walked into the shining white office
he took out today's files and cleared his throat. He looked
around the room. Something had changed since the last time
he was here. Maybe they added a file cabinet, or rather
taken out a few. Mike stopped before the desk. A new batch
of pens with the elemental seal had arrived... Nah, not
before the meeting anyway...
   "I'm on the porch, Mike"
   "Yes of course sir mister almighty sir!" Mike jumped to
his right and quickly began to walk towards the scenic
plaza. God was sitting in his summer suite next to a table.
He was reading what appeared to be a Hollywood tabloid. When
Mike stopped, about three yards from him, God turned to him
and smiled.
   "Good morning, Mike"
   "Good morning to you sir" answered Mike.
   "What can I do you for?"
   Mike handed God the files. He held them for a minute,
and then put them on the table.
   "Oh Jesus..."
   "Ah yes sir, I'm afraid so" said Mike in a tense voice.
   "What is it this time?"
   "Well, a fundamentalist priest in South Dakota was
accused of fourteen first degree murders" Mike explained.
   "Father Dakarey, yes I know"
   "Any case, he says he shot those people because Jesus
Christ told him to purge the world of sinners" Mike went
on.
   "What did my son say about this?"
   "Yeah, see, I couldn't really get in touch with him this
morning. Apparently he's still out with his friend, Paul.
They've been out since last night", Mike paused for a
second.
   "I know, Mike. I'll talk to him when he gets back"
   "It's just that these things are becoming a bit more
frequent lately"
   "All is well, Mike, have faith in your lord"
   "You know I trust you, sir" Mike flinched, "I'm only
saying this as your counselling barrister"
   God did not answer. He lifted his hand and a pen
appeared on the table. God signed the files, and went back
to reading the paper. Mike looked sideways at the headline,
something about Ben Affleck in a kiddie's pool. Mike placed
the legal documents back in his briefcase and went back into
God's office. Half way to the office door, Mike stopped and
walked back to the desk. Mike didn't know weather or not God
was looking but there was no noise or movement when he took
the batch of pens from the desk and put it in his jacket.
The old clerk didn't say anything either, but that figured.
As he waited to the elevator, Mike pondered about life. It
was a funny business, being God's lawyer, but it had its
moments. Once every couple of millenniums Mike had to give a
good performance in court, last time ended quite nicely with
a brand new religion being born. But then Mike thought of
all the other 'hushed' scandals. The 'you know' and the 'no
big deals', kind of like this new one... Nah, it could have
been worse. He could have ended like that Charles
Billbrook... Poor little devil...