It Begins

Oh god, I don't feel so good.
What was that?
I have to get up, or maybe sit down? I'm not sure. Get this
damn blanket off of me, I'm so warm!!
Okay, everything is ok, I just need to breathe a bit. God, I
feel so sick!
It feels like there are bugs crawling on me. Shit, why am I
shaking? What's going on?
Okay, just calm down, calm down, calm down, calm down, calm
down, calm down, calm down. Everything is OK, you've been
here before many times, and nothing has ever happened; no
reason to be worried. Calm down, calm down, calm down, calm
down, calm down, calm down, calm down. Stop shaking! Where's
that blanket? I'm so cold!
OK, breath, just breath, breath...

Maybe I need to go somewhere, yeah! Get up and move, maybe
that'll help, just have to get up and move around a bit,
yeah.
God, I'm so scared!!
I'll go to mom and dad, maybe they can help!
Yeah, up the stairs, I'll just sit in the corner of the
room, and calm down, it'll be OK.
Mom, Dad, I am so scared.
I don't know why, I am just so damn scared.
No, I don't know why! I tried to think, I don't know, I'm
just losing my mind!!
God, I'm burning up, stop putting blankets on me!!
Wait, don't go to sleep!!
No, I don't know why I'm scared, but I'm losing my mind, I
know it!
I don't know how, I'm just so scared!!
God, somebody help me!!
I feel so sick!!!

It's over, I just know it, everything is ending right now!
Damnit, how can you not notice it?!
Everything is ending!!! Wait, no, don't go to sleep yet!!
You have to help me, you've got to stop whatever is going
on!!!
I'm freezing, give me a blanket!
Yes, I know my pulse is really fast!!! I'm going insane, how
can you not notice?!
I feel so sick!!!
No, wait, don't fall asleep! Help me!!!
OK, calm down, calm down...
No, I don't know why I'm shaking! What is this damn blanket
doing on me again? It's so hot in here, take it off of me!
God, somebody help me! Please! I'm so scared!!
I'm so scared, can't you see I'm going insane?!
I'm dying here, stop throwing blankets at me!!!
I think I'm gonna throw up!
I'm losing my mind, stop trying to ask me why!
I know I am, I'm going crazy, I can feel it!!! I'm so cold!
Why am I shaking? No, I can't fall asleep, I've been trying
to sleep for the last hour! Please, somebody help me...  
I'm losing my mind!!!

Don't go to sleep, you have to help me!!! Mom, tell me
about...  anything, but don't leave, don't fall asleep! No
dad, counting wont help!
Fine, fine, I'll try it, just don't go to sleep, please!
I'll count, I'll count, you have to stay awake, please!!! 1,
2, 3, 4, 5...  290, 291...  Dad, no, wake up! Come on,
somebody please help me! I'm losing my mind, I'm so scared.
You've got to help me, you have to get me out of this!!!
I feel so sick, give me another blanket!
God, don't leave me alone, you can't leave me alone right
now, not now!!! Anytime but now, I can't do this alone!
I think I'm gonna throw up, take that damn blanket off of
me!!!
Can't anyone hear me?! Stop acting so weird, can't you see
I'm losing my mind?!? I have to stop shaking! Why does
everything look so weird?! Please, anybody, help me!!!
I'M SO SCARED!!!
Somebody please help me, I can't make it stop, I feel like
I'm losing my mind...
God, please, don't let me go through this alone...

I can't do this...  I'm so scared

After two hours of being in a panic attack, I threw up, out
of pure pressure.
After that, my parents gave me a pill, and I fell asleep.
That was the scariest night of my life.
What you read was about a very condensed half-hour. But it
doesn't end so simply. When you wake up, you have a shadow
following you around, and all it takes is just a little bit
of fear, to drag you right back to that old panic attack. It
took me 3 days to leave my room after the first one.
Hell on earth seems to be the closest phrase I could find,
to describe what it feels like when you have to keep waking
up.
You want to feel the highest peak of fear? Forget drugs,
roller coasters, Car accidents, all that...
Panic attacks are Pure Fear, Uncut.